What Not to do in the Towers of High Sorcery
by She-Magus
Summary: I think the name says it all.


**I think the title says it all. I have never behaved when I was in any Tower of High Sorcery, so now I am not even allowed in. sheepish laugh I guess I could blame Azure, who is my character, for that. Azure is a gargoyle (go look it up in my profile for the full description of her) who is also, in a way, something like my sister.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Dragonlance blah blah friggin' blah!**

What I'm Not Allowed to do in the Towers of High Sorcery

1) I am not allowed to patrol the hallways, and when another mage walks by, shout, "Get to class! Hurry, or Snape will have your head!"

She-Magus calmly strode down the corridor in the Tower of High Sorcery in Wayreth. _Damn that gargoyle! _She thought.

The gargoyle, Azure, had dragged the mage along to one of her idiotic raves, and in the process, had too much to drink. She-Magus had warned her not to drink that whole bottle of vodka, _but no-o! _Azure just _had_ to challenge that old dwarf, succeeding miserably. She-Magus then had to drag the drunken gargoyle home; which was something the mage had to do too often!

Azure, in her drunken state, said, "I _dare_ you to cause complete and utter chaos in the Towers of High Sorcery!"

She-Magus simply ignored her, thinking nothing of it.

Well, it was worth a try.

Azure then spat, "Chicken."

She-Magus stopped _dead_ in her tracks. "Am not!"

Azure grinned. "Then prove it!"

"I would," She-Magus argued, "but what you are saying is _completely absurd_!"

"You are a chicken!" Azure continued "Bwak! Bwak! Quack! Quack! Cock-a-doodle-do!" the gargoyle taunted.

"Quacking is a duck! And the last one was a rooster!" She-Magus glared at Azure fiercely.

"But they're all reptiles!" Azure inquired.

She-Magus rolled her eyes. "A reptile is a – you know what?" the mage caught herself. Explaining the concept of the animal kingdom was just begging for a headache. "I am _not_ a chicken! And I am _not_ afraid to take on your little dare!"

She-Magus sighed, just realizing what she had got herself into. "What do I have to do?"

Azure grinned.

So here she was, waiting for another mage to pass by. She-Magus was sincerely hoping that the poor unfortunate soul wouldn't have a heart attack, because a young Red-Robe, Joe Blough, was just rounding the corner.

She-Magus stepped out in front of him and shouted at the top of her lungs, "GET TO CLASS!!! Hurry, or Snape will have your head!!! Five points from Griffondor!!"

The Red-Robe gave a small yelp of terror. He scrambled backwards and, stumbling, ran in the opposite direction, shrieking bloody murder.

2) I am not allowed to give the statues, or other mages, mullets.

She-Magus sauntered into the library in her home on Cristyne Island (S-M: yes, it is a place on Krynn. It's between Sancrist and Southern Ergoth in the Siriion Sea) and, taking up a book, sat on one of the chairs.

She was fully engrossed in the book, when Azure bounded in and sat on a chair directly across from She-Magus, grinning like a kender would after he managed to escape a herd furious minotuars.

She-Magus did her best to ignore the gargoyle, but that proved to be impossible. "What are you grinning about?" she snapped. "What did you blow up this time?"

"I've got an idea." Azure said simply, her grin growing ever wider.

She-Magus rolled her eyes, "Does it involve fire?"

Azure grew suddenly serious, "Actually…no,"

She-Magus stared at Azure in astonishment. "It doesn't? Oh, by the gods, the apocalypse is nearing! Azure isn't thinking about fire! We should throw a friggin' celebration!"

"What's up your ass?"

"I am curious, what is this idea you have?"

Azure grinned that demonic grin…which was becoming her signature trademark.

She-Magus crept into the courtyard in the darkness. She neared one of the statues. In the dim light, she could somewhat make out the image. It was a statue of Magius. Knowing full well that if she were caught, she would be in enough trouble to make a kender squeal, she pulled out a magic, purple lizard. Yes, that's right, a magic…purple…lizard.

Azure had claimed she got the dead – very dead – lizard from a White-Robed mage when she was at a tavern in Haven. Azure had also claimed the lizard could turn stone into a gel-like substance, which would make it easy to mold. Well, now She-Magus would see if it was true.

She set the lizard on top of Magius' head and chanted the rhyme

"_Lizard, stupid, of a purple color,_

_Turn this stone into one like no other._

_This stone shall now, turn into jelly_

_But not the kind that goes into a kender's belly"_

This was the first time she had ever cast a spell using a rhyme. She hadn't even known spells to be cast like that. Apparently, Azure had told the truth, because Magius' head seemed to turn into a squishy substance.

She-Magus sighed, vowing that she would turn Azure's short-sword into a snake. The mage set to work on styling Magius' hair.

A short period of time passed, and once she was done, she stepped back to take a look at her work. She had to admit to herself, Magius didn't look half bad with a mullet.

She-Magus gathered up her things and prepared to leave; the stone had already hardened to its original density. The sun was now rising, and already a few of the mages that inhabited the Tower would have risen from their slumber. She ran from the courtyard and entered the large wooden doors.

As a cruel joke the gods seemed to be playing, she ran right into Joe Blough, the young Red-Robe. He stared at her for a moment, but then he recognized who she was.

"You-you-"

"SHH!" She-Magus hissed. Then, waving her arms around said, "You didn't see anything."

"But-b-but-" he stuttered.

"_Drowshi_," She-Magus tossed a handful of sand in his face.

Joe sneezed violently, and then collapsed to the floor. Now the Black-Robe had another problem: _what to do with the body?_ She could just leave him here, but that would be no fun. So, she took out a knife, and quickly cut his hair…so that it was now a mullet.

What do you think? Should go on with the fun? Review and tell me what you think. Flames are accepted, but they will be used to warm my friggin' cold house! Our heater is broken!


End file.
